It hurts

I was smiling
My eyes were glowing
But you knew I was Sad
You asked me what was wrong,
I smiled and said nothing,
As you turned and walked away,
A tear ran down my cheek
As I whispered to myself...everything!


I try to stay strong,
Try to hold out,
But sometimes I break...

Into small, small pieces.

Years moved out, but even today,

I listen to loud music,

Because I'm scared of hearing

What’s going on in my head

I laugh and smile more
So that I can hide tears in my eyes.


But trust me, I am not afraid
Just tell me to my face,
Don’t make me wonder,
Don’t make me hope.
Just tell me, hurt me,
So I can move on...
It hurts more not knowing,
It hurts more to hope.
It really hurts!


                 - Jyoti

Mera Bharat Mahaan

Recently I got this forward from a friend.... It was worth sharing because many items here are the realities we see around us but we never thought about it..... I don't know what to say about it as many of these items were shock for myself... I never knew that I can be so ignorant.

Read it ...... take few minutes and think about it.



We live in a nation

Where Pizza reaches home faster than Ambulance & police,

Where you get car loan @ 5% and education loan @ 12%,

Where rice is Rs 40/- per kg but sim card is free,

Where a millionaire can buy a cricket team instead of donating the money to any charity,

Where the footwear, we wear, are sold in AC showrooms, but vegetables, that we eat, are sold on the footpath,

Where everybody wants to be famous but nobody wants to follow the path to be famous,

Where we make lemon juices with artificial flavours and dish wash liquids with real lemon.

Where people are standing at tea stalls reading an article about child labor from a newspaper and say, "yaar bachhonse kaam karvane wale ko to phansi par chadha dena chahiye" and then they shout "Oye chhotu 2 chaii laao....."

:O)

I guess there are just things in life
that sometimes you cannot just have
and sometimes you worked so hard
but you cannot have it.

Artistic Wish

These days I am reading novels of different authors… starting from Ayn Rand to Dan Brown to Jeffery Archer to Sidney Sheldon…. to understand their writing styles and pattern… All of them have different writing styles which make a similar scene look completely differently…. I might not like all of their creations but I certainly admire all of them for this differentiation and variation which they bring with their writing… They are in true sense Creative people.

As per my experience I can safely say that, Creative writing skill is very rare and only few have this gift. Writing requires plenty of imagination, observation and the innate ability to paint word-pictures out of anything under the sun…. All works of fiction, poetry, drama and other non-journalistic writings feature an amalgamation of these attributes. If there is a Wordsmith dwelling inside the confines of your heart, set him free so that he can engage his ingenuous talents in creative writing. However, you also need to learn when not to use a liberal sprinkling of words and when to use your imaginative power in order to make your work of art an enjoyable experience for the readers and yourself.

Even though I might have written so much on Writing but I myself is still a struggling to get these basics correct… but never mind.. It gives me immense pleasure to write so I won’t mind taking this pain again and again…. so that one day I can also acquire ability to lend color to his thoughts…and complete one of my Artistic Wish. Wish me luck!

Sad

In every decision, there are actions, and with every action there are results, the results will become experiences that will shape us to who we are. But sometimes they can even shatter a small budding mind with all those dreams…. Is that what we meant to do with this action- reaction funda….at least I don’t understand this big talks and opposite actions.

I was taught that, Life doesn't always look or smell likes a rose. There are times when fallen petals need to be picked up and crushed before the fragrance is set free once more…. But, what if petals are detached intentionally and then crushed so that they can never ever give that fragrance... Is that what freedom we are defining here… don’t we all want things to get better rather than making them worse? Then why this happens that, just when you think it can't get any worse, it can. And just when you think it can't get any better, it can.

Why everything is so confusing in this adult world… why can’t we continue with our perception as kids…. Perception which makes us believes that nothing can go wrong and it never goes wrong. But once that mirror breaks and we land in this world of adults not even a small thing happens in the way we want it to be… and we have this excuse that something even better is waiting for us…. At this moment I feel like saying…. “To hell with your something better I want what I want and nothing better can make me happy.”

I am sad and teary eyed :o( x … guess need to stop here and fight out in reality.

Nonentity

Memories are the best thing in life to have they never change while everything else around you can. This little poem is for those lost childhood memories.

You were my life,
I was only a chapter in yours

You were my eyes,
I was simply an image for you

You were my dream,
I was no more than a lost memory for you

You were my past,
I was nonentity for you.

       -Jyoti

A butterfly

Today I was tangled in my own confused little world where doubts had taken over…. Things look different from yesterday… life looks mystified. Present seems to be more perplexed. And as they say past is past but past brought you to your present that made you busy thinking about the future. Past makes me laugh and cry… future is still a mystery but present is what worries me the most. Things I wished from bottom of my heart never became part of my present....And what ended up becoming today's reality was never in my dreams... And that's where complications arises. What earlier seems to be an easy path, now appears to be confusing. The road ahead give the impression of a maze from where I stand, and I have nowhere to go but to move ahead in the mess without any destination.

But even at this crossroad of life there is something which gives me power to stand power to think….The power of HOPE... power to believe in something great, something superior within me. Something that clears all my doubts, all confusion and gives me clarity of thoughts after removing the ambiguity.

As I speak up my mind I realized that, not all things happen the way you want them to be, some are mere coincidence and others well they happen because of fate…. You may not always end up where you thought you were going but you will always end up where you were meant to be. So, it’s OK to reflect upon yesterday’s memories, but it's far better to live for today's joys and tomorrow's dreams. And if you don't get something you want, you might get something better…. And this is the way life behaves, when everything appears to be wrong something right definitely happen…As they say, Just when the caterpillar thinks the world is coming to an end, God makes it a butterfly!

Hope my chance of becoming a butterfly comes soon… and this world expands in front of me… so that I can also fly with those colorful wings! - Amen